Watch This!

I cannot possibly recount the number of times in a day that one of my children walks up, runs over, or slams into me and demands, "Mom, watch this!"  So. many. times.

• "Mom, did you see that play in the back yard?!?"
• "Mom, watch my super ninja kick!  Now watch my ballet kick!"  (You'd think this comes from our girl, but no.  It's always the little boy, and he does have amazing jumping ability.)
• "Mom, watch me shoot you in the face with my Nerf gun from ALL THE WAY over here!"  
• "Mom, watch what happens when I mix this stuff with this stuff!"
• "Mom, look at my art!"
• "Mom, watch this HILARIOUS YouTube video we saw!"  
• "Mom, watch this AWESOME Lego battle!"
• "Mom, watch this sand rock crumble into a million pieces!"

The list goes on and on and on. Hundreds and hundreds of opportunities to "watch this" every week.  I have basically been setting things aside and "watching this" for 14 years.  Can I be so honest right now and say that the subjects of small children's interests are almost never inherently interesting to me?  Is that okay to say out loud?  I mean, I love my kids to pieces.  But I just do not get excited about Lego battles and YouTube videos all on my own.

So, why do I watch?  Why do I stop what I'm doing hundreds of times in a week to watch things that aren't seemingly necessary uses of my time?  Well, that's just it.  They don't SEEM to be necessary uses of my time; but they are, in fact, necessary. 

When our oldest was just a tiny one wanting me to watch his trains and cars smash into one another repeatedly (Let me reiterate the "repeatedly" part.), the Lord was so faithful to reveal to me the importance and even necessity of those moments.  It was so clear to me that, if I spent all their little years telling my kids that I'm not interested in the things that excite them, they will inevitably feel like I'm not interested in THEM.  Yikes!  I would be training them to do life without me.  I would be teaching them over the course of hundreds of moments that they need to do life on their own.

I played this forward to their preteen and teen years when emotions run high and social challenges abound.  I thought about the number of times they'd be confronted with choices and conflicts and temptations.  I thought about the number of things they would learn and need to process.  There was the potential that they would get to all those moments, and they wouldn't even have the NOTION to come to me with their concerns or experiences, let alone know that they can freely come to me with anything.

So I watched.  I keep watching.  I don't ALWAYS watch every single thing all the time because I just can't.  I would seriously never get anything done ever.  But most of the time I stop, and I watch.

Here's how that's playing out years later.  Our oldest started public high school this year, and he tells me loads of details about his days!  He shares what he's learning.  He shares hilarious interactions.  He tells me the good and hard parts of his days.  He tells me about his successes and the things he wants to improve.  He lets me ask him questions.  He sometimes rolls his eyes at the things I'm interested in (factoring polynomials, anyone?), but he doesn't hold back.  It's just part of how we have shared life all this time, so we just keep sharing life.

I am not naive enough to think that he will always share every detail of his life with me, and I'm actually more than okay with that.  The cool thing is that, even now, he's not coming to me to ask me to solve all his problems for him or tell him how to run his days.  He's just coming to SHARE his days.  If it turns out that part of that is a little bit of problem solving, fine.  But mostly, I'm thankful for all those crazy car collisions and repeated Lego battles that trained us both to just share life as it is. 

Potentially one of the best things about this is that he loves to come home and ask how our day has gone here.  He loves knowing about all the parts of the day he missed while he was at school because he grew to have an appreciation for those things during the years he was here.

One of my prayers for my kids is that they grow up to be adults who love people well enough to share real life in all its stages and forms.  I want them to be able to play cars with little kids; talk to their peers about school and work; and share details and feelings about their days with their spouses.  I want them to be able to slow down, sit, and watch game shows or history programs with elderly people to share life with them.  I want them to be able to call grandparents on the phone and talk about their lives.  I want them to be able to ask people who come from different backgrounds and cultures to teach them new things.

Will all of these things automatically happen because I just stop and "watch this"?  No.  Is it possible for parents to create the kind of relationship with their children that I'm describing even if they aren't around as many hours in a day to "watch this"?  Yes.  I think it's more about percentages.  Do our kids hear us say no more often than we say yes?  Do they see us choose to focus on a million other things before we pay attention to them?

Parents of young ones, let this be an encouragement to you that it does make a difference to do totally random and maybe seemingly pointless things with your kids.  In the process, you will both be learning to share life for what it is... that it doesn't have to be an earth-shattering occurrence before it's worth sharing... and that, in fact, the sharing of life was actually the point all along.

I'm Back!!!

Nearly six years after my last post, after multiple random attempts to even figure out how to log back in to this thing, I decided I'm going to write again.  I have no idea where to start, and I'm sure not going to try to go back and fill in six years of events.  There will be no theme except the one I decided on a long time ago:  Whatever Comes to Mind.  I may or may not quickly get around to updating the sidebar to reflect the fact that there are two additional kids in our mix now, but that's all fine too.  I'm just starting....

What We Do for Ear Infections

It's that time of year when ear infections abound and people ask regularly what we do in our house to heal ear infections while avoiding antibiotics.  I am not a medical professional, so please do not take this as medical advice.  All I can do is share with you what works for us.  With that said, here goes:

1.  Olbas Oil outside your ear.  A drop or two behind and under your ear lobe.  And another drop in front of your ear on that little piece of cartilege that sticks out.  Recline for 5-10 minutes to get the fluids draining down.

2.  Garlic & Olive Oil drops.

• 2-3 tbsp. olive oil in a small pot.  

• Add 1 clove of garlic, peeled and chopped into 4ish pieces.  

• Heat on medium-low for five minutes, stirring regularly and making sure garlic browns but does not burn.  

• Wait for the oil to cool just a bit so it's warm but not hot.  Test on your wrist or some other sensitive area.  It's better to err on the side of cool than to burn the inside of your ear, so be careful here.

• Use a medicine dropper to draw up some oil

• Lay on your side, fill your ear canal with the oil, and let it sit for 1-2 minutes.  

• Flip your ear over onto a towel and let the oil drain out and repeat on the other side.  

• Cover your oil in the pan for re-use.  I often leave the garlic cloves in the pan for the second heating and then remove them for subsequent heatings so they don't burn.  When you're reheating you only need to warm the oil (as opposed to heating to hot and then cooling).  

• We do this every 2-4 hours 

 3.  Cut out pasteurized dairy and refined sugars.  Also limit the amount of grains, fruits, and other starches being consumed since sugar feeds infection.  Grains cause our bodies to produce more fluids of all kinds, so in addition to the fact that they turn to sugar and will feed the infection, the extra fluids give a breeding ground for infection.  Consume lots of good quality broth.

4.  Lots of water, of course.

5.  A warm compress on your ears can help a lot too.  I often do this at the same time that I do the Olbas Oil, and it's very helpful.

6.  Drinking hot tea can also help.  We like the Traditional Medicinals brand and often choose the Breathe Easy or the Lemon Echinacea Throat Coat varieties when we have ear, nose and throat issues.

What We Do for School...

There have been quite a few people who have asked me to share what we do in our home for school.  It's impossible to list it all because there is so much unplanned, unprompted learning and imagination.  But I tried to make a list of as many things I could think of.  There are no fun pictures... because if I took time for that right now, I wouldn't have time to educate my kids.  Hopefully you understand.  


A few things before I start:

1. No homeschool environment will look the same because each family is different.  That's one of the great things about homeschooling.
2. We have switched to a block schedule for some subjects because making transitions between subjects takes more time, and we have to gear up for each one.  You're the teacher in your home, so feel free to make similar adjustments as needed.
3. We don't necessarily follow a traditional school schedule.  It takes too long to get through material or takes too much time away from active and/or imaginative play time if we try to jam it all in at once, so we stretch things out over more months.  We break in to the school year with one or two subjects and gradually add a new subject every week or two, working up to a full schedule.  Then we get to taper off at the end of the school year when it's nice outside again.  
4. It doesn't take nearly as much time in the day to cover our content as it would in the school setting.  I don't have to collect lunch money, get a whole class in line, wait for 20 kids to get crayons out, or deal with discipline issues for a whole classroom.  As a result, we legitimately get more free time in a day/year.  Don't think that your kids need to be sitting in a desk for 7 hours in order to be learning things.  
5. The beauty of homeschooling is that you can slow down or speed up according to your child's abilities.  You don't have to do the same thing for every kid at a respective grade level, because each kid will have different abilities.  Remembering this helps to remind us as parent-educators to really sit back and evaluate each child as an individual, recognizing his/her strengths and weaknesses as well as how we can help maximize potential.  

There are a million things that could be said, but that's enough for now.  Here's what we use...

Bible

• Long Story Short by Marty Machowski  (Our whole family does this together, and it's fantastic!)
• ESV Bible for each of the older kids  (WTS Books is a good place to see some great options for kids)
• Jesus Storybook Bible for toddlers (they like to flip through and look at the pictures while listening)
• There are others we use too, but this is what we do on a daily basis

Preschool

• My Giant Sticker Activity Book
• Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons
• Letter of the Week.  My sister-in-law did an AWESOME preschool tour through the alphabet for my nephew this year.  I'm so excited to do this for Claire next year.  
• Lots and lots of educational toys, games, and conversation throughout the day
• Keep in mind that you do not need to compartmentalize your child's learning.  Sometimes we like to do that because it helps us check something off a list.  However, so much learning goes on if we just talk about what's happening in our surroundings.  It's important not to minimize the importance of this!

Kindergarten

• Veritas Press Phonics Museum (covers reading, handwriting, art history, art, and quite a few other random subjects)
• Math:  Saxon 1 (We purchased the Rainbow Resource version of the manipulative set to complement Saxon 1-3)
• Listen along with whatever the older kids are doing for History, Science, Latin, Grammar, etc.
• Homeschool Co-op:  PE, Art, and other random fun kindergarten things
• Lots and lots of educational toys, games, and conversation throughout the day

First Grade

• Grammar:  Shurley Level 1
• History:  Mystery of History, Volume 1:  Creation to Resurrection
• History Through the Ages Collection of Timeline Figures  I chose to purchase the CD of figures, and it's perfect!  To make a timeline, I secured 8 ribbons evenly spaced on a tri-fold board.  I printed all the timeline figures that went along with this year's lessons and put them on brightly-colored background paper The colored paper is an unnecessary step, but it makes it more fun.  We have a different color for each quarter, so we feel a sense of accomplishment four times throughout the year. Our second run through history, we will likely make a timeline notebook, but for now, it's really great to see everything in one view and see what came before or after something else.
• Veritas Press Phonics Museum (covers reading, handwriting, art history, art, and quite a few other random subjects)
• Math:  Saxon 2 (We purchased the Rainbow Resource version of the manipulative set to complement Saxon 1-3)
• Reading:  Veritas Press First Favorites Volumes 1 and 2 (Note: There are four pages in this link)
• PE:  Homeschool Co-op class... and LOTS of backyard play (the beauty of homeschooling is that we have HOURS of active play in a day)
• Science:  Exploring Creation with Astronomy (Apologia)

Second Grade

• Art and Music:  Homeschool co-op and random things associated with other subjects.  This is a really fun book:  Discovering Great Artists:  Hands-On Art for Children in the Styles of the Great Masters
• Grammar:  Shurley Level 2
• History:  Mystery of History, Volume 2:  Early Church - Middle Ages
• History Through the Ages Collection of Timeline Figures (See notes on this in First Grade section)
• Latin:  Song School Latin 
• Math:  Saxon 3 (We purchased the Rainbow Resource version of the manipulative set to complement Saxon 1-3)
• Reading:  Lots of reading!  Magic Tree House (www.magictreehouse.com has short comprehension quizzes for each book), Boxcar Children, books that correspond with history lessons, and just a couple of the Veritas Press Comprehension Guides (also several pages on this link, so flip through to look for books your child may be interested in)
• PE:  Homeschool Co-op class, YMCA basketball, and lots of active play
• Science:  Exploring Creation with Botany (Apologia) and corresponding lapbooks (Kit 1 and Kit 2)
• Spelling:  Institute for Excellence in Writing Phonics Zoo, Level A  (We'll be starting this right after the 2nd grade school year ends to get some headway before the start of 3rd grade)
• Typing Instructor for Kids

Third Grade

• Art and Music:  Homeschool co-op and random things associated with other subjects.  This is a really fun book:  Discovering Great Artists:  Hands-On Art for Children in the Styles of the Great Masters
• Grammar:  Shurley Level 3
• History:  Mystery of History, Volume 3:  The Rennaissance, Reformation and Growth of Nations
• History Through the Ages Collection of Timeline Figures (See notes on this in First Grade section)
• Latin:  Latin for Children Primer A
• Math:  Saxon 5/4  (I chose to purchase the materials and the teacher CD-ROM)
• Reading:  More Magic Tree House, Boxcar Children, Chronicles of Narnia with Veritas Press Comprehension Guide, and books to accompany history lessons (the Veritas Press catalog has all kinds of great suggestions.  We are looking at the fourth grade list to match our history for this year--again, lots of pages to flip through)
• Book Reports:  How to Report on Books: Grades 3 and 4
• PE:  Homeschool Co-op class
• Science:  Exploring Creation with Zoology 1:  Flying Creatures of the Fifth Day (Apologia) and corresponding lapbooks
• Spelling:  Institute for Excellence in Writing Phonics Zoo, Level A
• Typing Instructor for Kids
• Writing:  Institute for Excellence in Writing, Teaching Writing, Structure & Style

Helpful Organizational Tools/Ideas

• Purchase some side-load sheet protectors and some wet erase markers.  Slide the sheet protector over a workbook page (you may have to cut off the binder hole strip first) and have the student answer the questions with a wet erase marker.  Once you've checked the answers, remove the sheet protector, wash it, and use it again.  Save yourself loads of time and money that you would have spent photocopying pages or buying disposable workbooks for additional children.  
• I love the index card idea listed in this blog entry:  Raising an Independent Learner
• MP3 players for each kid if possible.  You can load all their audio learning tools onto their individual MP3 players, and they can listen to History, Latin, Grammar, Spelling, etc. through headphones while building Legos, playing with dolls, staring up at the clouds, whatever.  I found some very inexpensive 4GB players on sale the day after Thanksgiving.  They're not iPods (my kids don't need anything that expensive), and they do take a little bit more time to load than an iPod, but the Philips players we have definitely work for what we need.  I also purchased an MP3 player speaker/case for each kid ($7 each) the day after Thanksgiving.  Their headphones are tucked inside with their players, and they can choose between headphones or speakers.  Also, it allows toddlers to walk around listening to all their older siblings' school stuff, which they thing is GREAT, without putting and MP3 player in their hands directly!
• Managers of Their Homes and Managers of Their Chores
• Large Family Logistics by Kim Brenneman.  There are ALL SORTS of great ideas in this book!  Even if you don't have a large family, there are great ideas you can implement and get yourself off to a good start.  I wish I had thought through some of these things with only one child.  (Note:  The beginning of the book seems a bit less balanced than the book as a whole, so if you're like me and think it's a bit over-the-top in certain ways at the beginning, keep reading.)
• A laminator!  The Scotch Thermal Laminating Machine is pretty economical.  Purchase the laminating sheets from Amazon to save money on those.  

Fun Supplementary Materials

• The flash cards in the dollar bins at Target at back-to-school time are fantastic!  I laminated several sets, hole punched them, and put them on binder/index card rings.  I use suction cup hooks (found at Target in the hardware section) on the side of our school bookshelf to store them in easy reach for the kids who need them but out-of-reach for babies and toddlers
• Building Thinking Skills Series 
• Math-in-a-Flash flash cards
• Rocket Math is a free app for iPhones or iPads that is pretty fun for the kids
• Scientific Explorer's and ScienceWiz science kits
• AnimaLogic
• Imaginets
• Legos and K-Nex 
• Strategy games
• Puzzles
• Magnifying glasses
• Art supplies
• Grow your own butterflies
• The list could go on and on and on.  You get the point.  The hands-on stuff is fun AND educational!  Do not diminish the value of letting your kids explore and learn along the way.

Helpful Resources

• The Great Courses
• The Well-Trained Mind by Jessie Wise and Susan Wise Bauer
• Search for local homeschool co-ops in your area
• Homeschool Legal Defense Association--lists requirements for each state and has a whole host of other helpful resources available
• Classical Conversations  Even if you don't sign up for the CC co-op, you can purchase and use many of their resources.  

Favorite Homeschool Suppliers

• Amazon.com
• Christian Book Distributor
• Rainbow Resource
• Timberdoodle
• Veritas Press

Thoughts On Adding a Third Child (or Fourth, Fifth, etc.)

I had a friend ask for some helpful thoughts as she prepares to move from two to three kids. Here are some of the things I shared...

1. Try to schedule some extra help right away, but also again at about weeks 6, 7 and 8 when you've reached the peak of your exhaustion. It's such a blessing to have someone come and take the olders to the park in the morning so you can rest, enjoy a little quiet, or just get something done that's driving you crazy. If that person can also put the baby in the stroller and go for a walk with all three kids for 45 minutes, you'll be amazed at how refreshed you are when it's over.
2. For me, it's sometimes not easier for someone to be in my house helping me. It's actually easier if, once every couple weeks, Chet can take all the kids out for an hour and a half (between me feeding Will) so I can be in the house by myself to get things done or just collect myself.
3. Suggestions of spending time with each kid are great. And it's also true that it might only be 5 minutes. Somehow, the Lord multiplies that 5-10 minutes so that it means a lot more than that to the kids.
4. Remember that babies don't often die from crying. If you have to leave the baby laying down screaming his/her face off for a few minutes so you can pick up your screaming toddler, that's okay. It's not quiet. But it's okay.
5. Try to be conscientious of the fact that you're asking your kids to drop what they're doing regularly to help you... and be willing to drop what you're doing every once in a while to help them too. Not always. I am certainly not kid-centric around here... but I definitely don't want my kids feeling like they're put on this planet just to help me.
6. Consistency with discipline is key, and at the same time consistency with attention is key. As you consistently pay attention to your kids, they become assured that your discipline is really for their individual good and not just because they've interrupted you again.
7. Make plans and try to improve them when they're not working... but mostly realize that no day can look exactly like any other day. The Lord will challenge you to become more and more flexible, to grow in grace more and more, and to die to yourself and become content in Him more and more every day. As you are growing in this, your kids will see where your joy comes from (helps to explain it too), and you can help them grow in contentment with the things the Lord has given them as well.
8. I like to keep this thought in mind: If I sent my kids to a child care center, I wouldn't want the workers to be neglecting my kids in the name of constantly cleaning and doing projects... and I wouldn't want them neglecting the cleaning altogether in the name of playing with my kids. Sometimes the kids have to wait while you get something done, and sometimes the dishes can sit on the counter and pee in the potty seat because you're reading a story to them. It's impossible to be everything to everyone. Only God can be everything to them, so when you feel like you're failing, point them to the Lord and remind them that only He can satisfy the desires of their hearts.

I know that all of these things sound like terrible cliches and like a list of impossible demands. Hopefully, you'll just read it as thoughts to keep in mind to help you balance yourself when you feel like things are out of control. I'm in a stage right now where I just can't seem to catch up. And then I have to remember that, even if it's 5 or 20 years from now, I'll catch up... I just hope that I've spent enough time with my kids along the way that they'll come back when I'm sitting in my clean, empty house.

Did the Teen Years Come Early?

I wish I could record all of my conversations with my kids. Ladan was having a hard time sleeping, and we ended up having the best chat until 11:30. He might be tired tomorrow, but I'm hopeful that his sleep will be more restful than it would have been with all those thoughts swimming around in his head. Some of his thoughts:

• He remembered the time last semester when one of the kids in his class had an eye patch. It just so happened that his friend started wearing the patch the week after Ladan kicked the ball in dodge ball, and it accidentally hit his friend in the eye. He's been feeling guilty because he thought he hurt his friend. Turns out his friend was just having an eye problem corrected that had been there for years.
• He started thinking about how terrible it must be for kids whose parents are separated and how they might feel like half-orphans a lot of the time.
• He was concerned that his friend, Byron, might be on the opposing soccer team in PE tomorrow. He doesn't want to accidentally hurt his friend if they're both going for the ball at the same time.
• He's a little bit nervous about Saturday's basketball game against his coach and former teammate from last session. He wants to do the best job he can for his own team, but he wants their team to do a good job too.
• He's realizing that, while God has provided some really great friends here, he might never forget some of his Louisville friends for the rest of his life. I hope he's right.

These are just a few of the topics we discussed. I'm so glad he felt like he could tell me his concerns. They might seem like small potatoes to some, but for a seven-year-old, it's big stuff.

The theme throughout our discussion was how cool it is to see God working and providing what we need at every stage... even if what we need isn't the same as what we want. No matter what, He is there with us helping us when we feel alone or scared.

And at the end of it all, in a way, I'm kind of glad that I didn't have to wait until the teen years to have a late-night heart-to-heart with my kiddo.

Realistic Optimism: Lessons from a Seven-Year-Old

Earlier today, I was explaining to the kids that I want to try out an Ergo baby carrier with Claire in it (one of our local stores has them in stock and allows you to test them with your kiddos). Ladan replied, "Cool. I guess if it works, you can use it for Claire when we walk too far for her to keep up. And then, if our baby doesn't die, you can use it for the baby too." Just that matter of fact. Yes. Precisely. And WOW!

I love that he doesn't take things for granted and at the same time isn't fatalistic and woeful. We have walked through some tough situations with friends who have miscarried, friends who have had stillborn babies, friends who have had children die shortly after birth, and friends who have had children die at very young ages. As it turns out, several of our friends are dealing with trials like these right now. We explain to Ladan what's happening and how we can pray for these families throughout. Ladan has learned not to just assume that everything is always going to be fine. He tears up when he learns about the death of a baby. And he prays for the families he knows are struggling as they grieve the loss of their little ones.

At the same time, he can maintain a balance that also does not assume that something WILL go wrong. As he is fully aware that things can and do go wrong sometimes, he is also consistently looking at the bright side of things and remembering all that there is to be thankful for. He can do this in a way that doesn't make light of horrifying situations and at the same time doesn't minimize the great things that are happening. It's a pretty great characteristic for a barely-7-year-old, I think.

It's the kind of approach where you truly look forward to what's ahead and can be genuinely and overwhelmingly thankful if and when things go really well... because you know that it didn't have to be that way. You know that things could have gone really wrong. But they didn't. And that is not to be taken for granted. But what if things go wrong? Well, you knew that was a possibility. And as much as it still stinks to high heaven when you're in the middle of it, and you could be gasping for air to breathe because it's so hard, you know that there must be SOMETHING to be thankful for. You just have to find it. It might take time, but you'll find it if your eyes and heart are open.

It's realistic optimism, and I love it! It's just a hunch, but I think the Lord also delights in seeing this kind of thinking in the mind of a 7-year-old He created.

My Brother

Yesterday was my brother's birthday. My sister-in-law, Amber, thought it would be a really great idea to get 31 people to write him letters of encouragement on his 31st birthday. Fun! Most people who know me at all also know that I'm pretty close to my brother and that I think he's one of the coolest people I know. I thought I'd go ahead and share the letter I wrote him so you can see why I think he's so great...

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Well, HAPPY 31ST BIRTHDAY!!!!!!

In honor of your special day, I decided it would be fun to list 31 really great memories I’ve shared with you. There is a rough chronological order, but since I’m nearing my elderly years as your much older sister, my dating is a bit foggy. I’m sure you can forgive me. Here goes…

1. Watching you play baseball and soccer… and many other sports.
2. Seeing you in the stands (or beside them running around) while I played softball and soccer… and many other sports.
3. The first time we got to go to the concession stand by ourselves to purchase a pretzel or the ever-so-coveted chili pie (or whatever that mix of Fritos, chili and cheese was that we hardly ever got to eat) at the field.
4. Enjoying the Cosby Show every Thursday at 7pm… followed by Family Ties, Fresh Prince, and whatever other show filled in the fourth slot. No television lineup will ever be as good.
5. Playing NERF basketball in that teeny tiny bedroom of yours.
6. Breaking into the house after school through the bathroom window when we would forget our house keys.
7. Riding our bikes or walking to Taco Bell to break up the boring summer days at home.
8. Playing wiffle ball in the back yard with Greg, John and Dad.
9. Going to that water park in Waterloo, IL where they had the super-fun waterslides.
10. Swinging upside down on the monkey bars at Salem. First the little ones, then the big ones, then the really big ones where we all played that strange dodgeball game knocking people off the bars.
11. Grand Haven. Getting our clothes totally soaked the first day we arrived and couldn’t resist running out into the waves. Russ’s. The pool at Days Inn. Walking the pier. Running down the sand dunes. Taking our rafts way out into the lake and then seeing how far the waves would take us before we reached the shore again… and realizing that sometimes it would take us much farther than we had anticipated. The day you dug a hole in the sand as tall as yourself while I made a mermaid beside it. Watching the sunset.
12. The long car rides to Michigan and back. Stopping at the same truck stop restaurants in the middle of the night every time: Brazil and Tecumseh. Ordering a cheeseburger and fries every time no matter what the hour of night was and knowing you thought I was a little crazy for it.
13. Running into you and chatting for a minute between classes in high school.
14. The day we went to the riverfront right before you left for boot camp. Sending letters back and forth during boot camp. And better yet, the day you came home from boot camp!!!!
15. Hearing about the Lord’s work in your heart and seeing you IMMEDIATELY begin to run hard after Him.
16. Writing the first check to help you fund an overseas mission trip. Then seeing missions become your life. It has been more than amazing to see all the Lord has done throughout the world as He has used you as an instrument!
17. New Orleans!
18. My wedding weekend. We laughed hysterically at all manner of silliness during the rehearsal. There aren’t many people who have such a fantastic laugh as you. Then on the wedding day, you carried the train of my dress all around the Botanical Garden so it wouldn’t get dirty. Even when other people offered to carry it, you took over and made sure to do it yourself. You take care of me just as well today, even if it’s from far away.
19. The first time you told me about this girl you met in Houston and then proceeded to hand the phone over to her so we could talk directly. She was great from the start!
20. Spring break in Houston and Galveston. I remember standing off to the side with Amber and Chet praying as you shared the Gospel and a few dollars with that homeless man we encountered.
21. Going shopping for Amber’s engagement ring with you.
22. Praying for you the December day you proposed… and then getting really excited when you told me how it all went down!
23. Your wedding weekend. Do you remember when all you guys were hanging out the night before the wedding, and Chet decided to drive the Corolla over a speed bump? Then there was that Sesame Street character that flatulated quite loudly at the push of a remote button. Oh my word. On your wedding day, I got to help you get wrinkles out of your shirt, watch them reappear just minutes later, and then try to get them to go away again. Then we had the joy of watching you forget all about the wrinkles when it was time to demonstrate to everyone watching that marriage is a picture of the Gospel.
24. Laughing with you on the phone when you repeatedly suggested that we attempt to simultaneously conceive. And finding out within a couple months that we got pretty close!
25. Thanksgiving in the mountains of New Mexico. Remember that porcupine on the post high in the air? Weird. Remember how the wind was so strong that it blew all the smoke from the super-cool fireplace back into the house, and we all had to sleep with wet washcloths over our faces so we had some humidity to breathe? HILARIOUS!
26. Getting to walk through some of the hardest times of our lives TOGETHER. Mom and Dad’s divorce. Dad’s death. Relationship struggles. Marriage struggles. Parenting struggles. Personal sin struggles. And then getting to celebrate together as we’ve witnessed God’s grace to help us and sanctify us in and through each of those situations.
27. Seeing you hold Ladan just a couple days after he was born and watching you smash his cheeks to your own. Seeing Gabe’s cheeks squish between your fingers. Seeing Claire’s cheeks jiggle like Jello when you shake her high in the air. Knowing that you love them like they’re your own… and not just because they have great cheeks!
28. Talking to you as you nervously drove Amber to the hospital to give birth to Titus. And then talking to you in what seemed to be only about four-and-a-half minutes later when he was born! Receiving texts in the middle of the night when Justus was on his way and seeing photos of his sweet face just minutes after he was born. Then getting the opportunity to love on your boys like they’re my own.
29. Titus’s and Ladan’s first birthday party when we ended up washing the icing off them in the waterfall at Forest Park. Hiking with the kids in and along the creeks in Benbrook. Taking them all to the beach in Grand Haven and hiking up the “cliff” at Gram and Ken’s. Watching the boys do science experiments together and then watch football with you to insure that they both get to share what they’re most interested in with one another. Enjoying the similarities and differences of all our kids and appreciating how God has created each of them to be unique and still equally loved.
30. Getting iced/snowed in at your house during moving week, resulting in opportunities to help you load your vehicles in snowy 1-degree weather, watch those hilarious comedy videos on YouTube all smashed on the couch, eat pizza that was literally swimming in butter, and wave to you as you drove off.
31. Throughout all these stages of life and specific memories, we have had almost daily contact no matter how far apart we are geographically. We may not remember the exact words of most of these conversations—and there may not actually be a whole lot of words spoken in a given conversation depending on the day and how many millions of things we’re doing—but you’re there, and I’m here. And that’s a pretty great thing to remember.

The Lord not only gave me a pretty great brother, but He gave me one of the best friends a person could ever hope to have. I love you more than words can say.

Happy birthday, Bro!

Love,

Phyll (a.k.a. Sister… and later, Phatty)

A Long-Awaited Perrin Twins Update!

SO MANY of you have been praying for and asking about our friends, the Perrins. I have had good intentions of writing updates, but they haven't materialized over time. Earlier today, I started a new blog entry and added a title just so I was that much closer... but I was wondering how I'd think through and write an update that is helpful. The Lord knew. I just sat down to start typing as much as I could in a few minutes, and I had an update written by Chris in my e-mail! Praise the Lord! Here are his words:

I haven’t sent an update in awhile, but since the babies will turn 7 months old this week, and we have some more medical hurdles to clear in the next couple of weeks, I thought it would be a good time to update everyone, and solicit some more of your prayers.

Both Hayes and Bailey are doing really well since settling in at home, and we’ve managed to keep them both healthy to this point through flu and RSV season which is a major accomplishment considering the weakened status of their immune systems. We were even able to get through a scare a couple of weeks ago when Emily was diagnosed with the flu, thanks in large part to the help of good friends and family who stepped up to help out when I couldn’t be there so that we could keep Emily quarantined long enough to get better so she didn’t spread it to the babies. Luckily we caught it early enough that Emily was able to get back on her feet in 4 or 5 days, as daddy, grandma, aunt, uncle, and good friends’ love just isn’t the same as mommy love! We visited the pediatrician yesterday for the final round of flu/RSV shot for this season, and the pediatrician said that she thought both babies were doing great… what a huge praise!

Bailey is now 22.5 inches long, and 10 lbs 12 oz (from 1 lb 9 oz at birth), which puts her at about the 25-50th% in length, and 10-25th% in weight for her adjusted age of a little over 3 months… if any of that means anything to you. I don’t think she could be a better baby. She is so playful and expressive, and really very calm most of the time… especially compared to Hayes… which might not be the best comparison for “normal” baby behavior (he is very fussy). Speaking of normal babies… we finally got Bailey off the oxygen! Her breathing test was during the time that Emily was sick, so I took off work to take her. I think it was more a test on me (and my patience), as she had to lay in a crib for 4 hours, and I had to try and keep her relaxed, and keep her from kicking off her monitor equipment… those of you who have seen her live in action, know that if she is awake she’s moving. She only kicked or pulled the monitors off twice, so I think I passed my test. More importantly, she passed the breathing test and has been off the oxygen for two weeks now… no more helium sized oxygen tanks with 50 feet of tubing running through my house, no more dragging a tank with us everywhere we go, no more taping a nasal cannula to her face and trying it in her nose when she keeps trying to stick it in her mouth and suck on it (gross). She’s been doing great (as far as I can tell) since she has been off of it, and will have a follow up appointment in a couple of weeks for the pulmonologist to check how she’s doing without. Please continue to pray that that goes well, and she continues to breathe well without any additional support.

Hayes is now 23 inches long, and 12 lbs 1 oz (from 1 lb 7 oz at birth), which puts him at about the 10-25th% in length, and 10-25th% in weight for a boy at his adjusted age of a little over 3 months. So they are both a little undersized, but Hayes is in the 50-75th% weight for length percentile which means he’s a good weight for his size. Unfortunately Hayes has not been as laid back as his sister. We are hoping that this is largely due to the pain and discomfort of the double hernia he was born with. They didn’t want to fix this until he got older and stronger, so he has required a lot of attention most of the time to try and keep him calm… a lot of holding, bouncing, rocking, shushing, etc. We have been told that because of his brain damage he wouldn’t have the self soothing abilities of a normal baby, so we are hoping/praying that his issues have less to do with that, and more to do with
the hernia because he has finally reached the point where they can do surgery. The surgery is scheduled for 8:30 tomorrow morning.... Earliest possible time and place we could get this scheduled for, and since we’ve been praying for this day to get here for the last three months it can’t get here soon enough! Dr. Bloss (who performed all of Bailey’s surgeries) will performing the procedure, in addition to circumcising him as this wasn’t done at birth (I assume due to risk of infection or something… don’t know why they didn’t do this at birth). It’s supposed to be a fairly routine procedure, and of course we have the utmost confidence in Dr. Bloss, but we would still appreciate your prayers. If all goes well, and he’s able to come off the vent fairly easily and timely, we should be able to take him home later tomorrow afternoon/evening. If not, they will keep him over night, and should be able to come home on Friday. So, in addition to praying for the surgery procedure, and for Dr. Bloss and the rest of the medical staff, please pray for his recovery, and that there aren’t any infections, side effects, or setbacks.

Also pray that this is able to help him relax, and be more comfortable, and that the issues we’ve been having with him aren’t all brain related. Of course we also continue to pray for his brain, and for miraculous healing to take place there, and that remaining portions of his brain can take over some of the responsibilities of the damaged portions. By all accounts he has been able to do more than the average baby who has suffered the degree of damage that he has. Unfortunately because of the discomfort from the hernia, the early childhood development (ECD) specialist has not been able to take him through all the motions, and really assess how he’s coming along. Bailey on the other hand is doing extremely well with her therapy, and we praise God for that! Hopefully we will be able to get a better idea of where Hayes is at next week when ECD specialist work him out again. In addition, he has an appointment next week with the neurologist who diagnosed him following his first MRI. Pray for a positive report there as well.

I know everyone has been asking for more pictures so attached are several of the latest. Maybe it’s just the stress level and sleep deprivation, but they really do seem to have a lot of personality and are a lot more fun to interact with than I thought they would be. I hadn’t spent a whole lot of time with babies before, which was a conscious effort on my part, because I just thought that all they did was eat, sleep, poop, and pee. I was pretty much right (only with less sleeping and more pooping/peeing than I ever could have imagined), but every now and then, in about 10-15 minute increments, they can be pretty fun.

Thanks again for everything you’ve done and continue to do,
CP, Em, Hayes, and Bailey

I am amazed daily at how the Lord has grown these babies! They have squish! They smile! Hayes is upset for much of the day, but he does smile! These kids LOVE their family, and they know that they are loved by their family. These and many other things are miracles that are not to be taken for granted.

Please continue to pray for the Perrins. Pray for Hayes tomorrow as he goes in for surgery. Pray for the physicians. Pray that he experiences relief from his discomfort. Pray that his brain continues to develop. Pray for Bailey's continued growth and development as well. It's always a bit scary to even enter a hospital with your children, knowing that it's a germ factory. Pray for protection from illness for everyone in the family so that there is nothing else getting in the way of the babies' wellness, healing, and growth.

PRAISE the Lord for all that He is doing in their lives! Praise Him for preserving the lives of both of these babies through so many major obstacles. Praise Him for using this whole situation to draw the Perrins and countless others closer to Himself, the only One in whom we have any hope!

Perrin Update #5

To those of you who have been following the story of our friends, the Perrins, for the last 104 days... big things are in store this week! PLEASE KEEP PRAYING!!!!!! Here is an update Chris sent on Friday along with some photos of these growing babies:

Hayes and Bailey are 14 weeks old, and today is their 100th day with us… pretty big milestone given their condition 100 days ago… especially when you think about the fact that they weren’t even supposed to be here until almost TWO WEEKS FROM NOW. God has been good!

They weighed Hayes over night, and told me this morning when I stopped by that he is now at 5 lbs 2oz (remember he started at 1 lb 7 oz). He is now taking 6 of his 8 daily (24 hour period) feeds from a bottle (the other two through the feeding tube still). He still hasn’t mastered this completely yet. It’s frustrating because some days, like last Saturday when I fed him, he’ll gulp it down in 10 minutes (which is a record by the way… we make a great team… just wait until those father/son potato sack races when he gets older). Other times, we’ll struggle for 30 minutes, and he’ll only be able to take a quarter of the bottle. He never has a problem with sucking, but sometimes he just refuses to swallow. The nurses aren’t sure if this is due to gas, reflux, or just simply a consequence of the brain damage that he has, and that he might never get this down 100% (they initially thought there was a high chance that he wouldn’t be able to swallow at all due to the extent of brain damage he suffered). Despite these issues, he is doing a great job at breathing on his own now for more than a week! That’s right, breathing completely on his own, the same way you and I do… no breathing tubes, no oxygen, nothing! He hasn’t had any apneas or needed any additional oxygen since they took him off. He’s also regulating his temperature on his own now just like a normal baby. The only thing keeping him from going home right now is the bottle issues. Please continue to pray that he can master this so we can get him home without any additional attachments (i.e. feeding tube).

Bailey is now a couple of weeks completely infection and bacteria free! She now weighs 4 lbs 8 oz, and is slowly getting bigger. She has started working on bottle feeds as well this week, but has struggled more than Hayes did initially. Because of the infections, surgeries, and setbacks, she has become a little more used to not having to “work” for her nourishment. Yesterday the occupational therapist worked with her, and she seemed to do better with last night’s bottle. Today the speech therapist (didn’t know they did stuff like this) will also work with her on mastering the suck, swallow, and breathe all at the same time issues she’s been having. They are also going to do an x-ray of her lower intestines (which haven’t been used in three months) to see what kind of shape they are in, because they have scheduled surgery for her for next Thursday (11/18) to reattach her intestines! We are excited about this, because we were not looking forward to taking her home with a colostomy bag that doesn’t seem to want to stay on (this thing is disgusting by the way), and we weren’t looking forward to taking her back to the hospital after having her home so they could do the surgery. In addition, getting her back together is going to help her grow because it will give her intestines more time to absorb all the nutrients and calories from her meals. So, they are going to transfer her again on the 17th to Texas Women’s in the Med Center to prepare her for surgery on the 18th. If all goes well, she should be back at Clear Lake about a week later. Please pray for this, and for no more setbacks because if all goes well, we should be able to take both of them home by early December!

Both of their eyes seemed to be doing better, and by better I mean no worse. They are still getting regular eye exams and treatment as needed for the ROP eye issues they both have. Please continue to pray for this as well. Likewise, we still don’t really know the full extent of the issues Hayes is facing with his brain damage, and won’t for months/years down the road. We still pray for a miracle, and at the same time for peace and comfort in whatever God’s will is for him. Continue to pray for Emily. She is doing great physically and emotionally with everything that is going on, but I know things are going to be getting more difficult as she prepares to bring them home, and possibly having one home and one in the hospital, and all the attention that everyone needs (including dad J) throughout this process.

(Left--Bailey all cute and happy; Right--Hayes and Emily)

Most of all, don’t forget to praise God for all he’s done for us, and Hayes and Bailey to this point. It truly is a miracle that they are still with us, and doing as well as they are considering where they started and everything they’ve been through. The Lord has already used them in a mighty way to touch so many people, and we praise Him for that. Thank you so much for your continued prayers, love, and support. It means so much more that we could ever express, and we hope that you know that.

Attached are some great pictures from the last week. They have so much more personality, and look cuter and cuter as they continue to get bigger and develop… especially Bailey, but she’s a girl, and girls are always cuter than boys… Sorry Hayes, you’re still my favorite though… as parents, we’re supposed to have favorites, right? I’m still new to this.

Thanks again,

CP and Em (Hayes and Bailey)

Y'all this is such great news! There is so much to be praying about for this family, requesting help and mercy from the Lord. At the same time, this last 104 days should provide motivation for all of us to drop to our knees humbly before the Lord THANKING HIM for all He has done! Please pray over the next couple weeks as Bailey is transferred, has her surgery, heals, and moves back to join her little brother. Please pray for endurance for Chris and Emily as they care for two babies in two different hospitals. Please pray for Emily's mom (Barbie), who is in Houston with them helping them take care of the massive number of details that have to come together every day to make all this happen. And pray for the rest of their extended family members... all those who would love to be right there with them but can't. Pray that everyone would grow in his/her love for and trust in the Lord. Finally, pray that the Lord will use this family's situation to impact YOU and help YOU grow in love for and trust in Him!

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER

Have you downloaded it yet?

Whole Grain Pumpkin Flax Pancakes

I made a large batch and saved a bunch for later. Here's what I did to make about 32-33 5-inch pancakes.

Ingredients:

• 4 cups (1 quart) buttermilk


• 2 1/2 cups old-fashioned rolled oats


• 1 2/3 cups whole-wheat flour


• 1 2/3 cups almond flour


• 3 teaspoons baking powder


• 1 teaspoon baking soda


• 1/2 teaspoon sea salt


• 2 1/2 teaspoons cinnamon


• 1 teaspoon nutmeg


• 1 teaspoon allspice


• 4 large eggs, lightly beaten


• 1/2 cup packed brown sugar (I use sucanat)


• 2 tbsp. coconut oil (olive oil is okay too but not quite as nutrient-dense)


• 4 teaspoons vanilla extract


• 1 1/2 cups pumpkin puree (I made my own by following the directions listed as part of this recipe)


• 1/4 cup flaxseeds, ground (use the coffee grinder)


• 1/4 cup whole flaxseeds

Preparation:

• Mix buttermilk and oats in a medium bowl; let stand for 15 minutes.


• Whisk whole wheat flour, almond flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt, cinnamon, nutmeg, and allspice in a large bowl.


• Stir eggs, brown sugar, oil, vanilla and pumpkin puree into the oat mixture.


• Add wet ingredients to dry ingredients; mix gently until just moistened. Fold in ground flaxseed and whole flaxseed.


• Cook as pancakes or waffles. Works equally well with both.


• Top with coconut oil and real maple syrup for a tasty finish! Almond butter seems like it would also be delicious.

All It Takes Is ONE

All it takes is one. All it took was one strand of E.coli to be processed into one hamburger patty, to make it to one burger king, to one mom, whose one son, took one bite and the one life he had would then be over. All it took was a series of one events to lead to one of the biggest recalls on beef. Because of one situation America has never been the same.

In 2001, one man, Vernon Burger (my brother), who had, one passion, that being Jesus, took one trip, to Southern Sudan and connected with one bishop, who was trying to love and spread the gospel to many who were orphaned by the civil war. Since that one trip in 2001, HIS VOICE GLOBAL has been in an ongoing relationship with the EPC (Evangelical Presbyterian Church), 10 years and three orphanages later they seek to continue the movement to open a fourth.

You might ask the question what makes this place so special? Sudan was in war for over 20 years before signing a peace agreement in 2006. Until the peace agreement this was the longest civil war to date in human history, leaving over 2 million dead and many children without parents. So what makes this place unique!?!? Many things but one is there are many who have teamed up, like HIS VOICE GLOBAL and The Village Church, to be a gospel centered presence through proclamation and practice. While The Village Church has sent many teams to train pastors, equip leaders and love the children in these orphanages in Yei, HIS VOICE GLOBAL was the door that God used to bring a gospel centered presence from the west into this area of the world. Now there is an opportunity for you to be a part of this continued movement of Christ in this region for as little as a dollar.

This past September a group of 13 from all walks of life from Reach Records, The Village Church, Red Revolution, Collision Records and HIS VOICE GLOBAL partnered under The Village banner to go and minister to those in Southern Sudan. They ministered through teaching, medical, music, and loving children who were victims of the Civil War that now live in one of the three Orphanages sponsored by HIS VOICE GLOBAL. Moved by the fruit there and continued need, Tedashii, Lecrae (Reach Records artist), Swoope (Collision Records artist) and Jai teamed up to do a single to raise awareness and funds for a fourth orphanage in Southern Sudan. The single, which is slated to be released November 16th under new label Collision Records is called Actions Speak Louder. This single and symbol seen above calls believers to move beyond awareness and put their prayers in motion, to quote the song. The symbol inspired by the scriptures that say a strand of three cords are not easily broken (Ecclesiastes 4:12), the exclamation points showing the immediate nature of the call to apply the gospel (Luke 4:18-19), the highlight of one exclamation point showing the power of one to change and lead others and the patch like design showing the reality that there is strength in numbers, calling believers to action, an action beyond themselves.

So leading up to this date will you be the one to blog, the one to tweet, the one to put a twibbon on your twitter account, the one to Facebook, the one to lead and allow you actions to speak as loud as your words. The average number of songs downloaded per day are close to 10,000,000 yes that is correct 10 million. Come November 16th HIS VOICE GLOBAL only needs over 250,000 one’s to download this amazing song (which is not even 10% of the daily average) to complete and have a fourth self sustaining orphanage. We are not asking you to change your lifestyle just point your efforts toward something that will last. The amazing thing about this whole campaign is that 100 percent of the profits from the song will go toward this fourth orphanage. All it takes is one!!!

Fun Things to Hear Your 6-Year-Old Say

Ladan just wrote his first journal entry. He wrote:

"I love to play with my frends. Please help my frends. I love them. My best frend is God."

After he was finished, he said, "Mom, I don't want to follow Satan, so I've decided to believe and trust in God. I'm going to repent when I'm sleeping, and then I'm going to do right things. Because Jesus wants me to do the right thing." [Not too sure what he means about repenting while he's sleeping. I think he just means that he's going to try to do better tomorrow.]

I was cutting a pear for him, and when I handed him the plate, he said, "Thanks, Mom! Hey, Mom! I said, 'Thanks,' right away! I did what honors God right away! Satan tried to trick me into not honoring God, but it didn't work!"

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While watching the theme song to the PBS show Word World while the gas man was here fixing our gas leak last week, Ladan heard the line, "Nothing's better than a letter." He stopped and looked at me and said with surprise, "Mom, they just said, 'Nothing's better than a letter.' But that's not true. God is better than everything. He's better than a letter. Why do you think that they think letters are better than God?"

I responded, "It's possible that they really do think that letters are better than God, and that would not be good. But maybe they just mean that nothing on earth is better than a letter. Since nothing on earth right now is better than God's Word, and the Bible is written with letters, then I guess it could be true that nothing on earth is better than a letter, huh?"

He replied, "Oh, right! I hope that's what they mean, because it would not be good at all if they thought that a letter is better than God."

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"Mom, I like you a lot. But there's someone else I like more. God. He's better than any person, so I like him more. But I still like you a lot. Just not as much as God."

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While doing math the other day, Ladan said, "Mom, sometimes I write my 3's backwards. But it doesn't mean I'm going crazy. Sometimes I just forget." Then he moved on to the next problem as if he hadn't just said anything funny at all!

Perrin Update #4

It has been a while since I've had a chance to write an update about my friends, the Perrins. A lot has happened in the last three weeks, that's for sure!

Let's start with Hayes. Chris was able to hold him for the first time on September 28 (Day 55), and they had all kinds of great conversations about sports. Chris is the director of game-day operations for the Houston Texans (in addition to his full-time job as an accountant), so he had all kinds of things to share with Hayes about that week's game. This is something that Chris has been so eager to do with a son--talk about "the game"--so this was no small blessing! Considering that Hayes could have died on multiple occasions already, we know that this is a MIRACULOUS blessing and one that is not taken for granted! Check out his SWEET face!!!!!

Since that day, Hayes has continued to PROGRESS (also a word that the doctors didn't really expect to use to describe Hayes' condition). He moved from continuous drip feeds through the feeding tube to bolus feeds (where they dump a feeding's worth of milk through his tube at once instead of a slow steady drip). He handled this really well and was required to practice sucking at the same time he was being fed so that he would begin to associate the sucking motion with feeding. Shortly after, he began to drink from a bottle!!!! This is again totally miraculous, because the doctors told Chris and Emily to expect that Hayes would NEVER be able to move off the feeding tube to a bottle or other form of feeding, because his brain most likely wouldn't tell his airways to shut off to push his food to his stomach! AMAZING!!! The next time you swallow anything... a drink, food, saliva, your gum... you'll know that this is a GIFT!

Chris heard that reggae music is stimulating for babies' brains, so he did his good daddy duty and played some Bob Marley for Hayes on the iPod. Hilarious!

Hayes is now almost 4 pounds. He continues to struggle with some apnea episodes, and while it's definitely an area that we hope improves, this is normal for a baby in his stage of development. He is completely off the ventilator and is just relying on the nasal cannula for a bit of supplemental oxygen... something else that the doctors told Chris and Emily not to expect he'd ever be able to do for any length of time.

There is still so much that is unknown about how long or how completely the Lord will allow Hayes to develop. He is amazing people left and right though as He works to grow this little boy. Our merciful Father is granting Hayes the ability to do things that no medical professional thought he'd be able to do.

A couple months back, I gave this little guy the nickname "Tank", and when you see this next photo of his handsome face, you'll see that this nickname is seeming more and more fitting every day! If you scroll a few blog entries back and see his tiny, very frail self just a couple months ago, you'll know how HUGE the details found in the last few paragraphs are!!!! The Lord has performed miracle after miracle in this little man's life! We have reason to HOPE in our strong, perfect, wise, and purposeful Creator! Please continue to pray with great hope that the Lord will continue to work miracles in Hayes' life and that the 25% of Hayes' brain that is remaining will be used in astounding ways as he develops further. Please also pray against further infection, especially as we enter cold and flu season.

And on to Bailey. Throughout this whole ordeal, Bailey has definitely dealt with a greater number of physical issues (recall her ruptured intestine and surgery, necessary heart surgery, collapsed lung, and a couple smaller infections). Despite this fact, her prognosis has consistently been more optimistic than her little brother's. She has an ostomy bag until her intestine repairs enough for it to be reattached, and this has slowed down her feeding progress compared to Hayes. She has had to be fed smaller amounts and has progressed each step a bit more slowly, because the tear in her intestine was so high that they have to be careful not to rupture it again. The problem is that the ostomy bag, while helpful as her body heals, is an additional site for infection to enter her body.

Bailey began to regulate her own body temperature, and so she was able to start wearing clothes. (Hayes did this as well several days after Bailey.) Here she is in one of her super-cute flowery outfits next to her Beanie Baby so you can get an idea of her size. Chris estimates that she's about 12-14 inches long max. He also joked that if you had to wake up to a life-size Beanie Baby, you'd quickly see how traumatic this whole experience has been for the babies! Ha!

Bailey moved from the ventilator to the nasal cannula a few days after Hayes. And finally on day 65, Chris was able to hold her too! Can you even imagine waiting 65 days to hold your baby girl!?! I cried when I saw the photos. I imagined how happy it must have made Emily to see Chris have the opportunity to finally hold both the babies. As a mom, it's fantastic to hold your babies... and it's equally fantastic to see them all snuggled up in Daddy's strong arms.

You probably noticed Emily's awesome hair in that last photo. She always has GREAT hair, even if it's in a ponytail! Probably not the most important detail, but it's definitely noteworthy.

Anyway, back to Bailey.... With regard to feeding, she was on continuous feeds through the feeding tube, getting less than Hayes so that her intestine didn't rupture. She got extra calorie supplements as well so that she would keep growing. She was moved to bolus feedings, getting smaller amounts than Hayes at each feeding, and went through the same sucking-while-being-fed practice with the hope that she too would be able to move to bottle feeds and have her intestine reattached (she needs to be able to tolerate bolus feeds before this surgery can happen). I told Chris it was a little bit strange to pray that his kids would suck... but I agreed to do it in this case. It won't be the last time we pray such things for them, I guess, so we better get used to it. Bailey was progressing, slowly, but surely.

"Was" is the key word in that last sentence. Sadly, Bailey came down with an infection several days ago. They backed her off the bolus feeds and went back to the continuous drip-style feed. She was put on antibiotics. Then stronger antibiotics. It wasn't working well. Chris and Emily went to the hospital yesterday morning, and she looked very sick (see the left photo below). By the time they went back in the afternoon, she had been put back on all her monitors, had her cute clothes taken off, and was back on the ventilator (see below right).

Today, it seems as though her infection is getting a bit better, as her spinal tap was clear. Can I just stop and say that I've had just a couple needles in my spine throughout my life, and they were not fun! I had a spinal tap when I was about five, and I still remember it. I don't remember a lot of details about being five, but I DO remember that. I know that these things have to be done, but it makes me sad for these tiny little ones. They have these kinds of things done REGULARLY. They are troopers! Thankfully they won't remember ANY of this!

The goal for Bailey is to change her antibiotics again tomorrow to something stronger, re-start the bolus feeding (as a reminder, that's when they do a feeding of several ounces all at once through the tube as opposed to a slow drip through the tube)... and as soon as she's healed from infection and tolerates the bolus feeds, then hopefully they'll get to reattach her intestine to get rid of the ostomy bag and eliminate this entryway for infection. There are also discussions about whether or not they will remove her PICC line (a central IV line), because that too could be an entry route for infection.

Somewhere during the last three weeks, Chris and Emily learned that Bailey has ROP (Retinopathy of Prematurity). There are several levels, 4 being the worst. She's at level 2. This could mean nothing really, except that she might need glasses. It could also be worse, and could end up leading to complete blindness (that's usually a level 4 issue, from what I understand). Basically, it's too early to tell.

If you have followed all the way through this note, you are able to see very clearly that our bodies are very complex and that, in order for life to go on, so many things have to right all at the same time! Bailey's and Hayes' bodies have had some pretty crushing blows in the last 11 weeks or so since their birth... but overall, SO MANY THINGS HAVE GONE RIGHT!!!! We have reason to praise the Lord, and we have reason to HOPE in Him!

Please continue to pray for both babies, for Chris and Emily, for their other family members who do so much to support them, for the doctors and nurses caring for Hayes and Bailey, and for their church family who is walking through this with them helping them do things like mow the lawn and clean their house in addition to holding them up with prayer and encouragement. In the midst of this trial, Chris and Emily have already had countless opportunities to share their faith with others, pointing many people to the Truth of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. They are not only speaking of the hope they profess, but they are demonstrating it daily! As you pray for the babies, pray not only for their healing, but that the things the Lord is doing in their lives will continue to change the lives of many and that He will be glorified!

Thank you to those of you who are concerned and praying for our friends! I will leave with this simple truth from Scripture as Job is talking to God:


I know that you can do all things, and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted.
--Job 42:2

Amen! May we all be reminded that the one true God can DO ALL THINGS! He is the ONLY One who can do all things! Every one of our prayers is heard by this infinite God. Let's appeal to Him on behalf of the Perrins with increasing HOPE, trusting Him fully!

Perrin Update #3

Wow! So much has happened since my last post asking for prayer for my friends, the Perrins! Chris wrote an update yesterday that pretty well sums up what's been happening. I'll post that here and then leave you with some super-sweet photos of Hayes and Bailey (I stole the captions from their mommy and daddy).

Before I do that, I'll stop for a minute and tell you that I tear up just about every single time I look at these babies. Not because I'm sad... but because it is just apparent that they are wonderfully created. Try to pay attention to their little features. Their hands and feet are what get me every time. Those tiny little fingers and toes are amazing!

Throughout the last several weeks of watching and listening from afar (we're states away from the Perrins), I have at various times felt like throwing up, singing songs of praise, and sometimes both at the exact same moment. Like I wrote last time, this is REAL LIFE, and we can't run away from it. People struggle daily, sometimes with more intense trials than others... but people struggle daily. The only hope we have is in Christ.

Chris's words:

Bailey is doing great. She's 2 lb 9 oz now (which is a full pound since birth). She's on 5 cc's of continuous feeds, which is all she can tolerate right now due to how high the perforation in her intestines was. They've upped the calorie supplements though so that she will get big enough that they can begin to feed more, and that she will be able to absorb more in the short track of intestine before you colostomy bag. Once all of this takes place, they'll be able to go back in and re-attach her intestines. She is completely over the infection that started Labor Day weekend, and is completely off antibiotics. Outlook is really good for her going forward, but she is still less than 32 weeks from gestation, and about 8 weeks from being a full term baby. She continues to need prayers as she is still about two months from going home even if all goes well.

Hayes is doing great physically, which continues to make the brain issues that much harder to swallow. He is now 2 lb 8 oz, which is more than a pound gained since birth. He is on full feeds of 20 cc, and the full load of calorie supplements, so he's growing very quickly. He's also breathing well. Two nights ago they put him on a breathing cannula (sp?), which is exactly what you see elderly people with (the tubes in the nose connected to oxygen). This is really good because it means he's breathing basically on his own. He's breathing well, eating well (through feeding tube), peeing and pooping, growing, and moving all over the place. His only issue right now is the brain issue, and if not for that, his prognosis would probably the same as sissy's.

So, more on the brain... since the news from the neurosurgeon last week, we've sought out many second opinions. Our friend who is a nursing director at the NICU at Memorial Herman (which is one of the best hospitals in the world) took Hayes' records for the medical director there to look at. He basically confirmed what the neurosurgeon said, and added that his concern was that Hayes would never be able to close off his throat and prevent food, liquid, saliva, etc. from going directly into his lungs. This would not only mean feeding tubes, but constant suctioning of saliva and mucus. It would also mean that if he gets sick and throws up, most will go into his lungs, and on top of whatever illness he has, he will also have to fight pneumonia.

We have another friend from church who passed Hayes' story onto a friend of her's who is a neonatologist at Texas Children's (which is one of the best children's hospitals in the world), and she said that based on the info she had, that Hayes would not develop much past that of a three month old. Meaning, he would behave like a baby his entire life.

Finally, Emily's family has a friend who is the medical director at the NICU at Cook's Children's Hospital in Ft. Worth (also one of the best in the world.. and he trained at Texas Children's on top of that) who was in Houston on Friday. He agreed to come to the hospital and meet with Hayes' doctor, get all the details he could, and then meet with us, and give his professional assessment, but also talk to us as someone who has followed this whole thing from the start as a friend, and who has been praying and aching for us as well. He was very helpful in that he reinforced the level of care that they've gotten at Clear Lake, and the course of treatment. He said he wouldn't have done anything differently to this point. He also started from the very beginning, and explained in detail how we've gotten to where we're at, and how we've really already defied many of the odds. Unfortunately, he also reconfirmed Hayes' outlook.

It was good to hear him explain everything in such detail, and to have someone with that level of expertise weep with us and have a deep level of care for us than just that of doctor/patient. We haven't gotten any opinions that have given us any hope in not just a positive outcome, but in any kind of "quality of life" for our son, or any kind of longevity to his life because of all the complications and medical procedures he will require.

At this point, we continue to pray for a miracle, but also pray that God will give us the wisdom and strength to face the outcome that we've been given. We've already been through so much, and I know there's nothing we can't handle, but ache for our son. We ache that he isn't going to be able to do the things that "normal' kids do, and that he probably won't survive past childhood. We're grateful for all of the insight, and grateful to have such consensus in what he's up against, but it is heartbreaking to hear about him.

We know God has a plan, and that we don't always understand it, so we just pray that God will use the lives of Hayes and Bailey to glorify Him, and to make Emily and I better parents, spouses, and people. We thank everyone again for their prayers and support, and ask you to keep it up. We cannot thank everyone enough, and cannot express enough the way you all and your prayers have lifted us up through all of this.

Thanks again,

CP and Em (and Hayes and Bailey)

Hayes - Day 45 You sure you're comfy? This is how he wanted to lay.

Bailey -Day 47--Crazy hair after snuggling with mom and oh so sleepy

Bailey - Day 48--Nap time

Hayes - Day 48 -- Almost seven weeks old. 31 weeks from the beginning.

Breathing and eating well. Need a miracle on the noggin though.

Bailey - Day 49 --Posing for her upcoming hip hop album cover... Fo shizzle

Hayes - Day 52... Hook em horns! -------- Bailey - Day 52... M-I-Z

Hayes - Day 54-- We had a staring contest. I won... Get used to it son

Romans 5:1-5 and Psalm 73:23-28 are scriptures that come to mind MULTIPLE times a day as I think about Chris, Emily, Hayes and Bailey. May these scriptures be an encouragement to you to lean fully on the Lord and hope ONLY in Him as you encounter trials of every kind. In the end, the purpose of it all is the GLORY OF GOD! There IS purpose in these trials, and it's bigger than we could imagine! Right now, He's working to cause many (thousands just through this story alone) to humble themselves and lean on Him, to hope more fully in Him alone, and to be THANKFUL even if they're crying at the same time.

I told Chris that it's the hope of every parent that their children will impact lives and change the world around them. Already, in these short 7+ weeks, the lives of Hayes and Bailey and the stories of those who are caring for them are impacting generations! As people are drawn to their knees and learn more and more what it means to hope in the Lord, literal generations will be changed. And that's just PART of the really big picture! How great is that!?! May God continue to be glorified through the Perrin family! Please continue to pray for them all!

Romans 5:1-5
Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.

Psalm 73:23-28
Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand.
You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory.
Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

For behold, those who are far from you shall perish; you put an end to everyone who is unfaithful to you.
But for me it is good to be near God; I have made the Lord God my refuge, that I may tell of all your works.